From My Readings This Morning -Brotherhood Without Borders

Men need more platonic intimacy together. Brotherhood without Borders

"This is my sweet brother @intimatelyhuman. He has helped me move through so many of my negative associations with men".

One thing I hear over and over again from men is that they stopped receiving affection from their parents and their peers once puberty began.

There are many reasons for this. One is that testosterone decreases the ease of emotional expression so boys appear a bit more stern and shut down.

This isn't the case for all boys, but the ones who do have this effect are quite affected by it.

Another reason is the unspoken, yet deeply felt, fear of male sexual energy.

When a boy begins maturing into a man his own father's internal homophobia can cause the father to pull back kisses, hugs, and hand holding.

His mother may give him more space than she would have when he was younger because it's intimidating or harder to relate to them. One of the most important things for boys in puberty is touch.

Just consider this: boys start going into puberty and are treated differently by the people in their life. Then, in their isolation, they turn to porn.

So they're touch-starved, isolating, and spending hours (for most men and boys I've worked with) watching porn.

They begin developing in a dissociative state where the only touch is sexual self-touch in isolation.

This is no bueno and, I believe, contributes to developmental sexual trauma.

Whether it's competitive sports, dance groups, cuddling, or just simply walking with their arms around each other I hope more boys are encouraged and supported in normalizing male platonic affection throughout development.

For me, it has been life changing to have friends (especially straight ones) who are so comfortable with touch, hugging, eye contact, and affection.

It has helped transform the fear in my body around men into something more softer and trusting, and it has also helped me not see all male touch as sexual.

Meanwhile here's  a thoughtful and engaging blog post on platonic relationships between two men from ChatGPT:

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Title: Brotherhood Without Borders: The Power of Platonic Relationships Between Men

In a world where expressions of male affection are too often misinterpreted or boxed into narrow definitions, the beauty of a platonic relationship between two men is both powerful and undercelebrated. These relationships, rooted in mutual respect, deep emotional connection, and unwavering loyalty, are essential for mental and emotional well-being, but they are rarely given the spotlight they deserve.

What Is a Platonic Male Friendship?

At its core, a platonic relationship between men is a close, non-romantic bond that’s built on trust, shared experiences, and emotional support. Unlike surface-level camaraderie often stereotyped in popular media (think sports talk, competition, or sarcasm), these connections dive deeper. They allow space for vulnerability, reflection, laughter, and even tears, without the pressure of performance or the need to “man up.”

Breaking the Stigma

Cultural expectations and societal norms have long discouraged men from openly expressing affection toward one another. For generations, being “too close” or “too emotional” with another man was often mocked or misunderstood. As a result, many men grew up learning to suppress their feelings and limit their expressions of care to physical tasks or humor.

But the tides are turning.

Modern men are beginning to challenge the outdated narratives of masculinity. They are choosing to hug longer, listen more intently, and say “I love you” without feeling awkward or emasculated. In doing so, they are rediscovering the joy and grounding presence of brotherhood, one that isn’t tied to blood, but built through loyalty and love.

The Benefits of Deep Male Friendships

1. Emotional Support Without Judgment
   Having a male friend who truly sees and hears you provides a safe space to talk about mental health, relationships, fears, and aspirations.

2. Improved Mental Health
   Studies show that close friendships significantly reduce the risk of depression, anxiety, and loneliness, issues that disproportionately affect men who feel isolated.

3. Authentic Connection
   Unlike professional or romantic relationships, platonic friendships don’t come with performance expectations. They allow for genuine interactions and shared growth.

4. Lifelong Loyalty
   A true platonic bond between men can withstand distance, time, and change. These friendships often outlast jobs, relocations, and even marriages.

Famous Examples of Male Platonic Bonds

• Martin Luther King Jr. and Ralph Abernathy - Civil rights giants who not only worked together but shared a deep brotherhood.

• Matt Damon and Ben Affleck - Lifelong friends whose creative partnership and mutual support have spanned decades.

• Samwise Gamgee and Frodo Baggins (The Lord of the Rings) - A fictional example, but one that resonates deeply with real-world loyalty and sacrifice.

Redefining Brotherhood in the 21st Century

We are entering an age where male intimacy-emotional, intellectual, and spiritual is becoming normalized. The next step is embracing it openly, modeling it for younger generations, and affirming that platonic love between men is not only valid but vital.

To every man reading this: Reach out to your friend. Tell him you appreciate him. Don’t shy away from connection. You don’t need a crisis to open up-just a willingness to be real.

Because in a world that often asks men to be strong, silent, and stoic, choosing to love platonically is a quiet, radical act of freedom.

Meanwhile, here's the top five news of the Day 

1. Federal immigrant agent shooting sparks national anger
A U.S. immigration agent shot and killed a U.S. citizen in Minneapolis on Jan. 24, triggering widespread protests and political fallout. The incident — the second fatal shooting by federal agents in recent weeks — has intensified scrutiny of Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) and drew condemnation from local and national leaders. 

2. Historic winter storm paralyzes large parts of the U.S.
A powerful winter storm sweeping across the U.S. has forced thousands of flight cancellations (including over 10,000 currently reported), widespread power outages affecting hundreds of thousands of customers, and major travel disruptions from Texas to New England. 

3. Major U.S. flight disruptions due to weather
Closely tied to the storm, airlines have cancelled nearly 4,000 flights nationwide as conditions deteriorate, marking one of the worst single-day disruption events in recent history. 

4. Alex Honnold scales Taipei 101
Iconic climber Alex Honnold has completed a high-profile free solo ascent of Taipei 101, one of the tallest skyscrapers in the world, in a major achievement celebrated by the climbing community. 

5. Australian Open — Sabalenka advances
World No. 1 Aryna Sabalenka defeated Victoria Mboko to reach the quarterfinals of the 2026 Australian Open, a key early result in one of tennis’s biggest tournaments. 

Lastly, Did you Know that.....

In Ancient Rome, the middle finger had a name - "digitus impudicus" (the shameless finger). When Emperor Caligula wanted to humiliate his subjects, he would force them to kiss his middle finger. The gesture was so offensive that Emperor Augustus once banished an actor from Rome for flipping it to an audience member.

The Romans weren't the first to use this gesture though. Greek philosophers had been throwing up the middle finger since at least 419 BCE. In the comedy play "The Clouds," a character mocks Socrates by giving him the finger.

Ancient writers tell us the gesture was meant to represent male genitalia - with the middle finger being the phallus and the curled fingers on either side representing, well, you can guess. The Romans documented its use extensively, with poets like Martial writing about people using the "shameless finger" to insult doctors and enemies.

Even German tribes would taunt Roman soldiers by giving them the middle finger during battles, according to the historian Tacitus. Two thousand years later, this ancient gesture of disrespect lives on around the world.